My "True Life" Episode

I get some pretty strange ideas here sometimes…My mind wanders…Just today I was thinking about the MTV show “True Life” and wondering if I were to get my own episode, what would my “True Life” be? True life…I’m from a hippy town? True life…I’m addicted to cereal? True life…I made less than $3000 last year? Then I realized what it would be…So simple, right before my eyes. “True Life – I’m a Peace Corps Volunteer.”

Just today alone, I realized a number of interesting things happened to me…things that I think would shock/entertain and/or disgust viewers and hence would make me a great candidate for my own “True Life” episode.

Why today alone would be reason enough to give me my own episode of True Life:

1.PEOPLE (ME) FALLING: This morning, I slipped on my doorstep while carrying a heavy, leaking jerry can (bucket) of water . My point is: Who doesn’t love to see someone fall? If we could get a clip of me trying to carry that on my head and then I fall, even better!

2.WILDLIFE + GORE: I went to shut my bathroom door and I shut a lizard in it…The lizard was almost cut in two (It was horrifying, possibly made even more horrifying by the fact that I used to have a pet iguana as a kid), but most people like a little gore. And lizards in your bathroom? Well that’s just ludicrous.

3.PEE: I was in line at the supermarket this evening and a kid peed next to me… he just peed…on the ground…and I just stood there and muttered “uh-oh.” The gross part may have been that the kid peed right next to me, but the even grosser part might be that I was so not even phased by it that I didn’t really even move. I was next to the pee, but I wasn’t in the pee, so I held my spot in line, stepped over the pee, paid and was on my way

A few more reasons why I should have my own episode:

-No matter what, I will always be more entertaining than “Big Brother Africa” which, and this is a fact, is the worst television program (as well as television program idea) in the history of the television. What’s funny about Big Brother, is that if you are actually insanely bored enough to watch it, you’re pretty much sitting on your ass doing nothing, while you watch someone on t.v. sitting on their ass doing nothing…You might as well just stare at someone else in the room (or rather, change the channel) Or you’re sitting on your ass doing nothing, while you watch someone brush their teeth…Um, I brush my teeth twice a day, can I get my own program please?

-Sometimes I look at my arm and realize it’s the same color as the ground…Then I’m not sure if it’s because I’m really tan and I happen to have skin tone that’s a shade very similar to that of dust, or I’m really just covered in dust. Not sure how this is a reason…But I’m going to go ahead and keep it.

-I live in Uganda (I think) and I’m pretty sure about 80% of Americans don’t know where that is and probably would confuse it with Uruguay. And if I could figure out whether I’m living in Uganda or Uruguay (who can keep the countries straight?) and find one or both on a map…This could be a pretty educational program.

Note to MTV: Actually, I’m pretty sure I’m live in Uruguay…Do you guys film in East Africa?

-I have giardia (gastrointestinal bug from the water) about every other week.

To conclude, I’m not sure how my MTV “True Life” documentary would reflect on Peace Corps…It might not actually help the recruitment cause…But, what I’m guessing is someone would just watch because it was on (like Big Brother) and then say, “Well that was pretty random,” and then forget all about it.

Well, that was my (pretty convincing if you ask me…) proposal. If you know someone who knows someone who knows someone at MTV “True Life,” put a word in for me. 6 degrees of separation, right?